Pages

Machmas is Only Two Months Away!


The holiest of holy days in the Savage Calendar is vastly approaching us. In exactly 2 months, November 15, we observe the birth day of our Lord with the Savage Celebration of Machmas.

So now might be a good time to start buying gifts for all the Macho Maniacs in your life. (Cheap Plug : MachoChurch Bumper Stickers make excellent Savage Stocking Stuffers.) However, don't get too caught up in the over-commercialization of our sacred holiday. Never forget the true meaning of the Savage Season, bring good tidings of Madness and Joy to all around.

OHHHHHHH YEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!

Snap Into The Holy Video Vault!


We are proud to introduce a new feature on the site. The MachoChurch.com Holy Video Vault. Featuring hours upon hours of promos, matches, tributes and other forms of Macho Madness. So if thou art bored or seeking the wisdom of our Lord, SNAP INTO IT!

Time To Lay The Hammer Down (And Out)



On September 3rd, the Great North Wrestling promotion, out of Hawkesbury, Ontario, ran a tribute show for our Macho Messiah. The main event was slated to be WWE Hall of Famer Greg "The Hammer" Valentine vs The Holy Genius Himself, Apostle Lanny. However, "The Hammer", who got his nickname because his face looks like it was hit with one over and over again, decided to no-show the event.


Apostle Lanny is understandably pissed, going so far as calling Valentine a "mangina" and challenging him to a legit MMA match in a recent YouTube video. The video, posted after the break, also includes comments made by Valentine both promoting the event and a very disrespectful voicemail left for the promoter of the event, as well as some remarks from said promoter, who wrestles under the name Hannibal. 

A Message to The "Big Man"



Our Macho Messiah has issued the following statement.

"A real man handles his own business. He doesn't send his son to do his dirty work. Last time I saw your son he turned the other cheek right into my flying elbow! DIGGIT!. That makes ME the new Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the UNIVERSE! You want a piece of me, Big Man, BRING IT! I'll take you on any time, any place and then, yes, then all your believers will have no choice but to admit that you have greatly exaggerated your powers. In the end  it will be the light of Macho Madness that will triumphantly shine bigger and brighter than all the other ones over all of existence. OHHHHH YEAAAAHHH!"

God was unavailable for comment. Per usual.